The sensitive B*tch!

So your girlfriend fucked your roommate on your one-year anniversary, big deal. There's no need to break down in tears after your third fucking drink. It's embarrassing. I really don't feel like spending the rest of my hard-earned drunkenness talking about shit like "feelings" and "caring" so you either have to act like a man, or I'm bailing on you. The whole reason why we went out is to drink and meet some girls, so let's work on the latter part of this operation and find some new females instead of sobbing over the old ones. Go find your ex's friends and talk to them. Trust me, nothing pisses an ex off more then banging one or two of her "friends." Just please stop crying, Bro.

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Gawker Slams Press? (Nik Richie's Daughter)

"Sorry, But Babies Are Ugly" Oh, you probably don't think so. You probably think that your baby is "cute." Sure. Do you think a worm is cute? No. Your baby basically looks like a worm with a face and a couple legs. It's fairly hideous. I'm sure that your baby could very well grow up to be a cute child, or even a cute adult. But right now it is just a shriveled, crying, drooling, bald mess. If you saw a homeless man exhibiting the exact same physical traits as your baby, you would cross the street in disgust. Your hormones have you fooled. We're giving you the hard truth here. What are you going to do, widely distribute this post on all of your parenting message boards and newsletters and "social media" sites until countless thousands of readers flood into its comment section, inflating our readership statistics with their outpouring of rage? Go ahead, do your worst. We can take it. Your baby is ugly. Your baby? Your baby. Your ugly baby. G...

Addicted to porn

OCTOBER 7–A Minnesota teenager arrested for burglarizing a neighbor’s home told cops that she sought to steal cash and household items to help pay for her pornography addiction, according to a police report. Amanda Owens, 18, was nabbed this week for allegedly squeezing through the doggy door to get into Darin Pake’s home in East Bethel. Pake told Anoka County Sheriff’s Office deputies that he set up a hidden camera after his home had been burglarized several times last week. On Monday, the camera recorded Owens slipping into Pake’s home around 8 AM. “The defendant is seen walking throughout the house, rummaging through Mr. Pake’s things,” according to a probable cause statement. When questioned by investigators, Owens reportedly copped to entering Pake’s home on several occasions (via the doggy door) and stealing a jar of money and a camera, which she planned to pawn. The teenager, deputies noted, “stated she is addicted to pornography and purchased 20 to 30 DVD’s and owed money, t...

Millet Flour

"Michelle Williams, she was on Dawson’s Creek and a few movies since then. Anyway, she’s moved up to my area ( Sullivan County NY ), and makes appearances around here sometimes. Anyway, she came into a healthfood store I work at, and we’re a small town, small inventory type of store; and we didn’t have enough of what she was looking for (millet flour) so she ordered it. Now, ordinarily, when customers order something specific, we take a down payment. When I told her this, she refused, and said she’d rather pay in full later. I thought, shes loaded, she’s good for it. Well we ordered all her millet flour and she never came! We paid just about $300 upfront from our supplier company, and Nik, I don’t know if Shayne is into healthfood, but she may know what millet flour is, and it’s very hard to sell!! Just thought I’d blast this mediocre actress (at best) for the $300 that cut a week and a half’s pay from my check." [via] She needs to be antiqued with that Millet Flour.

Jimmi Jerx

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